By Dan Erickson
“High roll?” These are often the first words spoken to or by an opponent, (although they should always, of course, be preceded by a friendly greeting.) These words are generally said while holding two D6 or a D20, sometimes even while starting to roll. We all know what they mean, and why our opponent is doing this, but let’s break it down using every Magic player’s best friend: The Comprehensive Rules (last updated January 16, 2016).
“103.2 After the decks have been shuffled, the players determine which one of them will choose who takes the first turn. In the first game of a match (including a single-game match), the players may use any mutually agreeable method (flipping a coin, rolling dice, etc.) to do so.”
So what does this mean? It means that saying “High roll?” is actually the player saying “Do you agree that we are going to be determining who gets to choose who starts the game by rolling these dice?” Exciting!
Another important part of that sentence is the term “mutually agreeable method.” Prior to actually reading this section of the rule, I had assumed that random had to be part of it, but apparently not! Theoretically, you could determine who gets to start by arm-wrestling, having a singing contest, or by who can eat the most ghost-peppers before passing out. Heck, you could even play another game of Magic (although to stay consistent you would obviously need to play another game of Magic to decide who started the deciding game, and so on and so forth until the universe just collapses in on itself.)
Let’s be clear: I’m not actually advocating that you should do any of these things, and I’m sure the spirit of the rule is that the method should be quick and random. But a small part of me imagines a universe where all games of magic devolve into Shahrazad-like ridiculousness, and that part of me smiles.
Right, so aside from advising you not to pointlessly exploit a loophole you didn’t know about for absolutely no reason, why bring this up at all? Good question! We all just assume that high-rolling is the only way to determine who has the choice to go first, but it’s not! And now that we know that, what if there were better ways to determine this? Ways that still kept within the spirit of the rule (quick and random) but were more efficient! Wouldn’t that be great? (Spoiler alert: it would be.)
#2 Rock Lobster, Paper Tiger, Scissors Lizard
This method is used by a friend of mine, and while it takes more time than #1, it definitely has style. First, obtain a Rock Lobster, Paper Tiger, and Scissors Lizard and sleeve them (we’re not Barbarians, after all.) Next, put all three face down in front of your opponent, and have them pick one for themselves and one for you. You then both turn your cards face up at the same time (for dramatic effect, of course.) Who ever wins gets to decide. Yeah! And if you’re not sure who wins, ask someone who actually had a childhood whether rock beats paper or not. Geez.
#1 Odd or Even
This method still involves using one of the fancy polyhedrons you brought with you, but using superior dice-rolling technology we ensure that only one player rolls one die once! No more rerolls because of ties, no more rerolling the reroll while saying “wow, what are the odds.” Just a brief moment of confusion while you ask your opponent “Odd or Even?” and then sweet sweet Magic the Gathering time! It’s fast! It’s efficient! It’s the new sensation that’s sweeping the nation! Reinvigorate your pre-game seconds with Odd or Even! For even more value, feel free to make as many puns as possible depending on your opponent’s choice and the result (“Hmm, odd choice. Who knew, you can even!”)
Dishonorable Mention: Poker Dice
Want a more complicated and less efficient method involving more dice? Of course you don’t, because you’re a reasonable individual. Don’t be the Poker Dice person. I love Poker and have played it for years, and even I don’t want anything to do with Poker Dice before a game. Poker Dice: Not Even Once.
And there you have it! A comprehensive (or at the very least, comprehensible,) list of some spicy new pre-game deciders that are both more efficient and more fun than seeing who rolls higher. They also both have the added benefit of not triggering that guy who always insists that you re-roll a different D20 because Spindowns aren’t random enough. Everyone wins!
Dan Erickson
@erickson_dan on Twitter
Hello fellow Looters, I’m back after my long hiatus ! However, before we jump into our main topic, I need to set the scene:
You finally sit down after finishing your FNM. Your final record is 2-2. You feel pretty proud of yourself as you decided to bring that brew you always wanted to try. 2-2 isn’t great but it is better than the 0-4 you expected. Now you are sitting there staring at your two prize packs. Your eyes are wide and your mouth waters like a magic player getting to eat his first meal after a full day at a PPTQ. You hear a cheer to your left and turn your head. You notice the new player in the store just opened a foil Nissa, Voice of Zendikar. This makes you even more excited as you turn your attention back to your own bounty sitting before you. You slowly start opening your packs, taking a small pause after getting the wrapper open as that new pack smell hits your nose. You thumb through the pack and finally make it to the rare. Moment of truth…Remorseless Punishment. You sigh… Sadly, the next pack follows suit with another lackluster rare. At least you can use that Stormchaser Mage…
Has this ever happened to you? Have you ever thought that there has to be a better way to handle or get better value from you prize packs? Well search no further! I have helpfully sorted my suggestions in three categories: Value, Fun, and Third Category. Let’s dive in!
Do you like value? Do you often play divination in limited? Is Baleful Strix your favorite Magic card? Then this category might be for you. The following ways to use a booster pack are all focused on getting you that sweet sweet value.
The first, quickest, and easiest way to get value from your prize packs at events is to just take any store credit option offered. Now, I am aware that not all stores have this option available at events. If unsure, ask your store owner if they have any sort of credit policy. If they don’t, let them know that you are interested as this can be more profitable for the store owner as well.
Let’s say that we are our friend from the story in the beginning and we decided to get store credit instead of those packs (most stores give around two to three dollars a pack). We could have picked up some lower end standard cards that we needed. We could have even put it towards our next event. Some players can even use this method to “go infinite” (play for free over and over) at their LGS. I got second place in a “win a box” at my LGS and decided to use this option. I left enough store credit to play in my next event along with taking eight packs home.
Either way, despite each pack being only worth a few dollars, you will consistently get a return from your prizes that has a lot less variance.
The next thing that you can do to get value out of packs is to save them. Specifically, take them home, stash them away (I usually use an empty booster box), and save them. This can get you value in so many ways and is actually my number one recommendation if you don’t do it already. As a set is out for a longer period of time, they slowly become less available as stores stop ordering it. After a few years, printing stops. All this time, your pack will become more valuable (assuming it isn’t homelands). This is why saving your pack for a period of time generates value. In addition, you can also have this pack available to you to draft with which will save you money from having to buy it at an inflated price later.
There are even multiple ways to go about deciding what packs to save. At first, I used to save at least one pack from each event I went to. These days I simply make sure I have at least three packs from each set in my collection (some of the old sets I only have one). You can even save every prize pack you get if that is what you want. I have pulled from my collection of boosters and added to it over the years but it is always handy to have boosters sitting around. Especially ones that are out of print.
So this one is something that I don’t personally do but it would still be a valid option for getting more from your boosters. This option does take more time and effort as finding mediums to sell your packs isn’t always easy. On top of that, if you use an online platform, there are most likely fees and shipping costs which will remove some value from the equation. The best way to go about this would be to find someone you know who really likes to spin that wheel and open packs who may buy them from you for cheap.
Now, you can also get creative with this one. In my old playgroup, I was often the one who hosted drafts. I would charge about 10-15 dollars (depending on the set) to cover the cost of the packs. One time, I did the same thing but instead of using a booster box, I had used packs that I have saved from events. I want to stress this here, DO NOT TRY TO MAKE A PROFIT OFF YOUR FRIENDS. They will not be your friends for long. That being said, if it would cost the charged amount to run the draft in the first place, it should be fine. Transparency is really important here. When I did this, I even charged less than what a box would cost and my friends loved it because it was cheaper for them. This is a good way to get value from your packs and it is basically “selling them.”
The last way to get additional value for your packs is to trade them for cards. This will require you to find someone who really enjoys the rush of cracking packs. Your local serial drafting group may also take this trade as a pack has more utility than a constructed playable card to them. I personally fall into both the aforementioned stereotypes so this method is not for me. That being said, I have traded constructed cards for a spin of the wheel so I can tell you that these people are there.
I hope you found a few new ways to get some value from your booster packs. Now, what about having some fun with your boosters?
Now, we all got into magic for most likely the same reason: we enjoy playing the game. This category is all about getting more play from your packs. Who doesn’t like to have fun?
One of the quickest yet fun ways to use a booster pack is to play Pack Wars. This option option requires two packs, basic lands, and a friend to play with, but most Magic players/LGS should have these in abundance.
There are quite a few different rules for how to do a Pack War, but what follows are the ones I generally use. Each player needs one pack and ten basic lands (two of each color). Now, open your packs and remove the token without looking at the rest of the pack. Shuffle the basic land and the contents of the pack together (carefully if you value keeping your cards in good condition. I tend to pile shuffle as you can do it without scuffing corners and it also mixes the land well). Now, duke it out! I have done contests with this and even spent a good portion of a day Pack Warring an entire booster box. This is definitely a great way to open your packs that gets just a little bit more fun for your buck.
Out of all the suggestions I have made in order to get more value from your packs, this is the one that I love to do the most. Drafting is obviously one of the best ways to use a pack for fun as it is one of the intended uses. You can draft with 4-10 of your friends and this also allows you and your friends to save money. This option also allows you to play one of my favorite formats, Chaos Draft. A Chaos Draft is a draft that is done using packs for all different sets. This creates a completely crazy and unique draft format. Recently, at GP Oakland, my friends and I hosted a Chaos Draft in our hotel room after day one. At most Grand Prix, prizes come in the form of tickets which you can spend at the prize wall on many different packs from various sets. We each got four different packs during the day. Three were mixed in with the draft pile and one was saved for prizes. Some of the packs we had were: Ice Age, Innistrad, Darksteel, Return to Ravnica, and many more. It was a lot of fun.
Just saving one or two packs from each of your events would give you a draft set of packs every few weeks. If a few of your friends did this, there you have it! You can even save packs long-term in case you want to draft them for cheaper down the road. This leaves room for nostalgia drafting without breaking your bank.
Ok ok…I know this article was supposed to be filled with alternatives to just cracking your packs. That being said, simply opening your pack is still one of the best ways to use it. It is also incredibly fun, (as most of you know). Don’t be afraid of losing value all the time as getting to simply crack a pack is awesome. That time you pull a foil Ulamog will far outweigh the 50 times you may pull something mediocre. We play this game for fun, so crack those packs every once in a while! (Sorry Marshall…)
I personally think “Other” is a boring category name and there were a few more on this list that I could not call valuable or fun. (Editor’s Note: Third Category would make an excellent Indie band name.)
Now some of you may never do this, but I like to think the Magic community is awesome and I just want to share this option.
Let us go back to the example in the beginning. You got two packs for going 2-2. Let’s pretend that your last round opponent was one of the new players at your store who just had an event deck or some cobbled mass of draft cards and he was just there to have fun. You were 1-2 during the last round. He had no wins and just got matched-up due to people dropping. He is here to have fun though and continues to play. You beat him because it is clear he still does not have a great grasp on the game. I have encountered times like this all too often and sometimes, helping them out in a kind way or even giving them one of your prize packs can make them a member of the community for life. It may not be value or fun but I would say that it is very rewarding. Think back when you were just starting out. I am sure you can remember something incredibly nice someone did for you and it made you feel great about the Magic community.
I am not saying give away all of your packs you get, but just remember that a show of kindness every once in a while can be a great thing. Sometimes you can be rewarded back as well. I recently did this and then after the draft we went to go trade. He had some cards I wanted and he gave them to me as a very good deal because I did something nice. I then gave him a ride home because it turned out he lived a few blocks away from where my friends and I were headed. The Magic community is awesome! Let’s help keep it awesome!
This is neither value nor fun for people who are sane. Have you heard of this game yet? If not, good. Don’t look this up and never play it. If you do play it, shame on you! I’ve included it only because it is technically an “option.”
I hope this list gave you some ideas on alternatives for your future prize packs. There is no blanket way to use all of them but doing each option (short of Flip it or Rip it, of course) every once in a while should give you more value and fun from your prize packs.
Well Looters, that is all for this time. I hope you enjoyed my suggestions and if you have any questions or comments, please leave them below.
Until then, happy spellcasting!
Roy Anderson
@Sockymans on Twitter
The latest From the Vault set has been announced, and it’s a flavourful one! Announcing From the Vault: Lore! Let’s see what Wizards has to say about it:
“Delve deeper into the events that shaped the Multiverse—and show your opponents that those who don’t learn from history are doomed to repeat it! This limited-edition set includes cards from throughout Magic‘s history that are renowned for both their power and the stories behind them. Surprise your foes with blasts from the past they’ll have to see to believe.”
-Wizards of the Coast
Contents and Details:
Twitter Hashtag: #FTVLORE
Product Concept and Development: Sam Stoddard and Jeremy Jarvis, with contributions from Mark Purvis.
Release Date: August 19, 2016
Magic Online Release Date: October 10, 2016
MSRP: $34.99
Magic has always had a strong following of players interested in the story behind the cards. Even characters mentioned one time who happen to have no vowels in their name make their way into our collective imagination. That being said, we can probably expect some sweet reprints from old story-rich sets, perhaps from Dominaria? Alternate art Gerrard Capashen or Captain Sisay anyone?
They obviously have lots to work with when it comes to lore, so it’s anyone’s guess about what could be included. That is, however, half the fun, so let the baseless speculation commence!
One of my favorite things about Magic: The Gathering players is our unwavering interest in what lies ahead. No sooner is a new set spoiled than speculation begins for the next one, and the next, and the next.
I’m right there with all you speculators. To me, there’s nothing more fun than trying to guess the theme of the next set, or which mechanics they might use, or whether we’ll see yet another version of Jace.
So, without further ado, let the Speculation begin…
I hate to start with a downer, but I’m pretty certain of this one.
Why? Well, for one, let’s think of the enemy fetches from a marketing standpoint. Wizards is trying to make as much money as they can with their new products, which means they’re more likely to print cards that they know people will want to go out and buy.
Thing is, because of the success of original Innistrad, Wizards of the Coast (WoTC) already knows that the sequel will sell, regardless of what they put in there. So why would they add must-have items to an already must-have set? I think it’s much more likely that these cards will appear in a new, unfamiliar world, similar to what they did in Khans of Tarkir. That way, WoTC can be sure that players will buy the new set, even if the world is unfamiliar.
Furthermore, they’ll never allow all ten fetches to be in Standard at the same time. I mean, at that point, you’d have to think of a reason not to play five-colour good-stuff…
Wouldn’t you want to see the story behind Karn‘s creation of Mirrodin, or a set exploring the formation of Ravnica‘s original guilds, or the true story behind Nicol Bolas‘s summer reading projects? Enter the prequel block.
This is not totally unprecedented. Just look at Fate Reforged, which depicted Tarkir 1,200 years before the Khans, or Magic Origins, which told the stories of the core planeswalkers before they were planeswalkin’. Personally, I think a prequel block would be super fun–so long as there’s no equivalent character to Jar-Jar Binks, that is.
The fact that Emrakul wouldn’t appear in the new Zendikar block was probably the worst kept secret since Oath of the Gatewatch (because of all the leaks…get it?). It seemed like every other flavor text on Battle for Zendikar cards read something like, “Hey, haven’t seen that freaky jellyfish in a while. Wonder where he is.” Also, it’s been hinted that he has the ability to travel to different planes.
We get it. He’s not on Zendikar. Which would mean he’s on another plane. Which would mean he’s a planeswalker.
Well, not so fast. Wizards has said that Emrakul isn’t actually a planeswalker. But if the dude’s walking from plane to plane, how else do you express that in-game if not with a planeswalker card?
Was Gandalf really dead? Or Captain Barbosa? Or any character in any comic book? The only thing more fun than killing a beloved character is bringing them back in glorious fashion, which is exactly what they’re going to do with Elspeth. ‘Nuff said!
WoTC has already played with this aesthetic a little bit with the Izzet guild of Ravnica, but I think there’s still plenty of interest among players. I mean, ever since William Gibson’s Neuromancer, this has been a popular subgenre of speculative literature. Who wouldn’t want to see a set full of cities in the clouds, airships, complex contraptions, and ridiculous goggles? If enough players are interested, they’ll make it.
Of all the predictions on this list, this one’s my favourite.
First of all, let’s look at this from a story standpoint. We’ve already established that gods can be made and gods can be destroyed––just ask Xenagos. So when we return to Theros, what if we find that all the previous gods have been overthrown and replaced with new gods, gods that represent not just one or two colors of magic, but three?
Come on. You know this would be awesome. They’d have something like 10 devotion in order to turn into creatures, and then another bunch of wacky abilities to go with it.
Furthermore, players love the wedge theme. Head Designer Mark Rosewater said in his podcast that a wedge set was one of the most requested sets around, which is why they made Khans of Tarkir. Plus, the original Commander set featured wedge commanders, many of which are still very popular today. This prediction might not pay off for a while, but I’ve got my fingers crossed.
The new two-block paradigm proves one thing to me: we’ll see a lot more return blocks. Heck, we’ll already have back-to-back returns this year alone. And that’s awesome––with so many amazing worlds in the backlog, why not revisit them?
But you might be wondering this: why Kamigawa? That block wasn’t quite so amazing.
I’d have to agree with you there. It was sort of a train wreck, only with ninjas, samurais, and weird anthropomorphic rat people. The cards don’t play well outside of the block, and there are so many legendary creatures that it almost ruins the whole point of legendary creatures.
However, purely from a worldbuilding standpoint, there’s a rich template there. And, just when you thought they’d abandoned that world altogether, Kaseto comes along in the new Commander product. To paraphrase the great Bill Engvall: “There’s your sign.”
Sigh. This is probably my least favorite prediction on the list, but also the most likely. Actually, when asked about this very subject on his blog, Mark Rosewater wrote, “the question is ‘when’ and not ‘if.'” They did enemy colors in 2015, so I’m guessing they’ll do allies for 2016, and then off to four colors.
EDH is my favorite format, so I’ve got to admit, I’m a little nervous for this one. The flavor for quad-colored cards seems exceedingly difficult to get right. Case and point: the Nephilim from Dissension. In my opinion, the Nephilim kind of capture the feel of three of their colors, but there’s always that fourth color that might as well not be there.
On the bright side, I think we’re in a golden age of Magic. Design and story have never been better than they are now, which gives me hope for this one. Let’s see what happens.
I’m talking Lorwyn versus Zendikar, New Phyrexia versus Ravnica, Dominiaria versus Innistrad––stuff like that. War of the Worlds, Magic style.
Okay, I know it’s wacky. But this sort of thing isn’t totally unprecedented in Magic’s history, either. Time Spiral block played with older sets and planes converging. With New Phyrexia, we’ve also seen that old planes can reappear in new places.
And come on. Wouldn’t you want to see Squee take on Grimgrin? You know you would.
Just to troll us.
Hope you enjoyed this article! Am I a visionary genius or simply insane? Let me know what you thought of the predictions in the comments below! And remember… always Play the Ten Drop.
By Kyle A. Massa – Play the Ten Drop
You can reach Kyle at @mindofkyleam on Twitter or through his site www.kyleamassa.com
Goblins goblins goblins! This iconic tribe has been a part of magic’s history for about as long as we can remember. Little green men have been smashing faces for as long as there have been faces to smash. Along with most other common tribes, Goblins have had their fare share of “lords”, typically goblins that pump all other goblins. Possibly the scariest goblin lord to have ever been printed, Goblin Warchief eschews the lord mold and makes his friends faster and cheaper rather than stronger. One mana hasty Piledrivers? Two mana Matrons? Sign me up!
With Goblin Warchief coming in as an FNM promo for May, and Smash to Smithereens being the March Promo, red mages can finally have the tricked-out bling bling deck they’ve always wanted. Don’t forget about all the other sweet promos that exist for sweet red cards like Goblin Guide, Lightning Bolt, and Goblin Piledriver. The bling is real!
Also, just look at that sweet art! Mark Zug, the same artist who did Ponyback Brigade, puts his unique spin on this fierce fiend. At first, it appears that he’s wearing a fur coat, but a closer look reveals that he’s actually just wearing a dead animal. Awesome.
Your favourite draft-oriented limited set is back! Anyone who had a chance to draft the original Conspiracy knows that Wizards did a great job designing a set that is both interesting to draft and chaotic to play. We don’t know many specifics yet, but we can safely assume Conspiracy 2: The Reign of Brago will deliver on more draft nonsense and multiplayer hijinks. Let’s take a look at what Wizards had to say:
Long May He Reign
Add deeper layers of gameplay to your next Magic draft and fight for King Brago—or plot his downfall. The Conspiracy: The Reign of Brago set builds on the revolutionary abilities introduced in the original Magic: The Gathering—Conspiracy set, with new cards that affect the draft itself and new Conspiracies that twist the rules against your foes and those who dare oppose Brago. Trade votes and spread your attacks to manipulate the game in your favor.
How will you defend the throne?
This set is designed for eight-player drafts followed by free-for-all games of three to five players each.
Set Name – Conspiracy: The Reign of Brago
Number of Cards – 221
Release Date – August 26, 2016
Official Three-Letter Code – CN2
Twitter Hashtag – #MTGCN2
Initial Concept and Game Design
Final Game Design and Development
Languages Available – English, Japanese, Chinese Simplified
MSRP – USD $3.99
Again, we don’t know much right now, but those of us who drafted the first Conspiracy know how silly and interesting the format was. It’s clear that Wizards listened when we said we wanted more ridiculous draft interactions, and we can look forward to unraveling this strange and delightful format as more information is released. Get Hyped for Conspiracy 2!
Brago’s Back!
Coming soon!
Wizards of the Coast just dropped an A-Bomb on us with the upcoming release announcement of Eternal Masters !!! Now I know what you’re thinking, are we going to be getting our Dual Lands reprinted finally ?!?!? Sadly and obviously the answer to that question was already addressed in their announcement that no cards from the Reserved List will be reprinted in this set BUT we already know not one but TWO of the all-stars that are going to be in the set. It should be no surprise that both Wasteland and Force of Will are in and have already been previewed with some incredible new art, Force of Will having a reworking by the original artist Terese Nielsen. The most exciting aspect of this announcement is that they’ve decided to name it Eternal Masters and not Legacy Masters which leads me to believe that we could see some needed reprints of both Vintage and Modern staples as well. With four months to wait before the release of the set will be upon us you can be sure that there will be endless lists of speculation as to what we should expect to see but there are a few things that come to mind. I would be really excited to see any awesome reprints but some these seem like they are well overdue. It’s doubtless that cards like Show and Tell or Sneak Attack would be very well received. I’m certain nobody would complain about Snapcaster Mage or Sensei’s Divining Top and there’s definitely great choices of planeswalkers with either Liliana of the Veil or Jace, the Mind Sculptor. There’s also tons of utility cards like Flusterstorm, Abrupt Decay or Thoughtseize which could easily make the list. That doesn’t even begin to look at the possible lands like Karakas, Rishadan Port, Ancient Tomb or the notably absent from reprint so far ZendikarFetchlands. So no doubt the debate will rage on for months about what is and isn’t included in the set and all we can do is wait patiently and prepare, because if you haven’t already set yourself up with those Reserved List Eternal staples then pretty soon they’re going to be gone the way of the Dodo.
Set Name Eternal Masters
Number of Cards 249
Release Date June 10, 2016
Magic Online Release Date June 17, 2016
Official Three–Letter Code EMA
Twitter Hashtag #MTGEMA
Initial Concept and Game Design
Tom LaPille (lead)
Ethan Fleischer
Aaron Forsythe
Bryan Hawley
Final Game Design and Development
Adam Prosak (lead)
Sam Stoddard
Bryan Hawley
Languages Available English, Japanese, Chinese Simplified
MSRP $9.99
Eric J Seltzer
@ejseltzer on Twitter
ejseltzer@hotmail.com
The Oracle sat upright, her eyes white and unseeing. She had been blessed with a prophecy from Kruphix, the God of Mysteries. The Oracle spoke in a voice not her own, and none of the attendants could fathom the meaning behind her words.
“In time, three strangers will come to Theros. A scientist of great intellect, a barbarian of great power, and a cursed traveller, possessed of great darkness. All have come for one piece of three, the Orbs of Warding. Gods will rail and heroes will stand before them with all their courage, but all efforts to stop them shall come to naught. This I have foreseen and this shall come to pass.”
At first, the attendants were worried. The Orbs were well known, wonders given by the gods to mortals. But as the seasons passed by one after another and no sign of the strangers came, those who knew of the prophecy began to relax. This, of course, was a mistake.
The Scientist
Temple of Enlightenment, Polis of Meletis, Theros
The port-city of Meletis was bustling, filled with throngs of humanity going about their business with industry and purpose. Nets full of fish were hauled in, stone was shaped, and prayers were offered to the gods for a sunny and productive day. Through all the hustle and bustle strode Quennus in one of his guises, this one a human with coppery skin and violet eyes. His face concealed behind a hooded cloak, the crowds parted around Quennus like fish avoiding a shark, partly because of his size and partly due to the subtle magic he used to prod them aside. Coming to one of the main temples located bayside, a shining edifice of polished stone, Quennus slipped around into an alley out of sight of the main crowds.
The only door into the temple was locked and barred, but Quennus whispered a quick spell and his form turned to water, flowing through the bars before reforming into solidity. Quennus looked at himself. Everything in one piece, no lingering after-effects, no transmutation sickness.
“Theros may not have much to teach in the way of metalworking, but their familiarity with enchantments is impressive.”
Guise back up, Quennus calmly strode further into the depths of the temple, discreetly checking each room for his target.
***
They found him in the temple’s most sacred room, following a trail of open and unbarred doors and up to his arms in the magical safeguards protecting the Orbs of Warding. The defences were active, a storm of glowing sigils surrounding the thief. Every few seconds a bolt of azure energy would spark from the mass of symbols, mental spikes designed to confuse, shock and swiftly incapacitate a thief.
But they weren’t working, the intruder grimaced with each hit, but kept working, his arms waving a complex dance as they struck each symbol just after it discharged and deactivated them. In a few moments the entire enchantment shut down with a crackle of static, and the intruder rose, noticing the guardians. Rather than appearing fearful or concerned by the armed solider and the robed thaumaturge, the intruder smiled.
“I know, I know. Not my best work. A bit sloppier than what I’m happy with, but it got the job done.”
The soldier stepped forward, partially shielding his companion. Quennus could see this was a well trained move borne partly out of tactics and partly out of compassion.
“Thief. Before you stands Melind, hero of the Bloodskull pass, slayer of the giant Arakanos, champion of Ephara, and protector of this sacred temple. Surrender now, and you will lose only your freedom, and not your life.”
“Fascinating. I mean, I didn’t ask for your name, or your life’s story, but thank you I suppose for supplying them anyways. And no, I will not be submitting to imprisonment, though your intent is admirable.”
Melind frowned. He was, as Quennus would later journal it, a “remarkably robust human specimen”, even his frown caused muscle to shift. Clearly speeches like the one he had just delivered rarely failed to cower the audience into a pile of writhing hysteria. It didn’t take a sage to figure out who were the brains of the outfit. As if on cue, the thaumaturge poked his head out from behind the barrel chest of his protector, speaking slowly as if to a child.
“Are you saying that you haven’t committed a crime? If you believe so, we can arrange legal representation for you at your trial, but you should know that even if you are stealing the orbs for someone else, that is still against the….”
“Sages. They always think they are the only ones with more than half a brain.”
Quennus’ guise tightened its lips in frustration.
“No you idiot,” Quennus cut across with a snap. “I’m not denying the crime, I’m stating that your jurisdiction doesn’t apply to me. I’m from further away than your little mind can comprehend, your polis, your gods, and your laws don’t apply to me.”
Both guardians bristled.
“What makes you think you have the right to take the Orbs?”
“What makes you think you can take the Orbs?”
Quennus smiled, unhurriedly cracking his neck in a sideways neck twist reminiscent of an owl. Rather than the click of bone popping, there was a clacking as if of metal falling into place.
“I could list you at least seven reasons why I am taking an orb: you don’t know how it works and I do, I have greater need of it than this temple, what is the point of a powerful artifact locked away out of sight, the list goes on. But you are just attempting to stall me until reinforcements arrive with that famous Meletian rhetoric. I shall not be stalled. And you,”
Quennus spoke to the hero now.
“I will be taking the orb. You can try to stop me; no doubt you feel you must. But we always have a choice. Free will is important. You can choose to walk away now, with your legend and accomplishments intact. Or you can choose to try and stop me, but I warn you that you will fail. The choice is of course yours.”
Melinds’ meaty hands swiftly unstrapped a pair of solid bronze knuckle dusters from a sling on his belt, deftly strapping them to his arms.
“My left has felled a cyclops. My right has slain a giant. And I bring both to every fight. What makes you think you can stand against me?”
These were no back alley cutpurses ‘dusters, but finely wrought weapons of war, heavily constructed for maximum damage and studded on the knuckles with corpse-coins. Not exactly subtle, but then as Quennus watched the burly hero run straight at him with a blood-curdling battle cry, he reminded himself that he wasn’t dealing with a subtle man.
Melind was still a significant distance away when his partner waved his arms, clearly casting a spell. Quennus tensed for a attack, but a quick reading of the energy the thaumaturge was calling to him suggested a simple piece of battle magic, so Quennus let it complete uncontested. Melind suddenly leapt into the air as though fired from a catapult, crossing the distance of the huge inner sanctum in a heartbeat. With an incoherent roar he swung, his metal-clad fist crashing into Quennus with tremendous force.
It was indeed a punch mighty enough to feel a Cyclops, and yet Quennus did not fall. With a crackle Quennus’ guise was dissipated by the hit, but Melind hadn’t noticed, as he was trying to bludgeon Quennus into paste. A series of blows rained down on the Aven, each forcing him down. In the background he could hear the sonorous chanting of some kind of prayer coming from the thaumaturge, but there wasn’t time to pay that mind.
After four hits Quennus got the tempo of the guardian’s assault and surged up before he could make his fifth hit, shooting a palm into the hero’s thick chest. The piston-driven strength of the shove forced Melind back, and as he righted himself he saw what he was really facing. Which is to say, a half-machine avian humanoid. A distressing sight to say the least, especially when even regular avian humanoids didn’t exist on your world.
Quennus had over a long career of planeswalking noticed that there were many responses by natives when they discovered a visitor not native to their world or ecology, but most were just variations of a few base emotions. Quennus had predicted that due to his aggressive tendencies Melind would skip over fear and continue in aggression when confronted with the unknown, and as the swiftly drawn shortsword swished at his heart, he knew that once again fate did not have any surprises in store for him. The thrust was true, with a steady arm, but Quennus saw it coming and thus managed to deflect the blade’s point away from his more vulnerable area and into the right side of his chest, where the blade wedged into Quennus’ metallic sternum. As Melind tried to extract it, Quennus reached out and grasped the hero’s forearm in a grip of (literal) steel. Melind reversed his stance and tried to force the blade in deeper for lethal penetration, but with inexorable force Quennus pushed the arm out, extracting the blade. Now there was real fear in the would-be hero’s eyes.
“What are you?” he whispered.
Quennus tutted. “A great many things. Most relevant to this situation, the inventor of Stymphalian Bronze. Perhaps you’ve heard of it?”
The guardians had. Stymphalian Bronze was a newly created metal, said to be stronger than any before it. It has been created only a moon ago by a reclusive blacksmith of no renown. Word around the polis was that the blacksmith had refused to credit Purphoros with either the inspiration or knowledge to create the super-metal, and the god of the forge was said to be incensed by the slight.
“So, I can see you have, and I don’t need to explain to you that all this sword waving is worthless against someone whose is literally made of the stuff. You’re welcome for advancing all of metalworking knowledge by the way. If your forge-god was so mighty, then why does he allow you to putter around with bronze still? So primitive. But, I’m getting distracted.”
With a slight straining, Quennus hefted Melind bodily across the room to crash heavily to the ground, his knuckle dusters throwing up sparks they grated along the floor. This cleared the thaumaturge to fire the spell he had been holding back while he waited for a clear shot. The power of the sun burst forth from his hands in a blinding beam, transfixing Quennus. Instantly the planeswalker felt even his hardened metal components begin to melt and what diminished feeling he still had told him his flesh was blistering. This was beyond the thaumaturge’s normal ability, Quennus sensed an immense power emanating from the human, power not his own.
“That explains the chanting,” thought Quennus, as his wings snapped out, and he took to the air, anything to get the beam of sunlight off him. Swiftly though the beam tracked him as he weaved, glancing across his wingspan a few times and threatening to knock him from the air, but Quennus spat out a simple sleep spell learned in his youth.
Overcome with magical exhaustion, the thaumaturge fell to hands and knees, fighting the magic, and was able to raise a glowing hand to Melind, casting one final spell before slumping over. Now glowing white with the thamaturge’s magic, Melind rose, his fists crackling with solar energy. His confidence was back, and he looked ready for round two.
Quennus was not in the mood for round two. He didn’t know how much time he had. The attention of Ephara’s guards he could handle, but the reason he had been forced to leave Theros was because Purphoros was hunting for him. The real, tangible gods of Theros, much like the existentially-circumspect, distant gods of other planes, were an arrogant bunch, and did not kindly suffer ‘mortals’ to gain fame and renown without paying tribute. Quennus had refused to do so with his creation of Stymphalian Bronze, and now the minions of the forge god were also hunting him. He had to get the Orb and be gone soon.
“Enough. The gloves are coming off.”
Quennus waved his arms, arcs of power flying from his gestures in waves that filtered across the room. They passed through Melind without pause, sinking into the stone. The hero recovered from his flinch; plainly expecting some kind of attack. He saw that Quennus’ eye, the non-metallic one, was a brilliant sapphire orb without iris, whereas before it had been hazel.
“What have you done? The gods will protect me from your power, and with the blessing of Heliod and Ephara, I can strike even you down.”
“Perhaps you can, hero. But I think you will be too busy making a choice. Observe.”
Melind turned, and gaped in astonishment as an acolyte from the temple marched in. His eyes glowed the same shade of blue as Quennus. He was followed by another acolyte, and then a member of the public. More came. In a moment Melind was surrounded by a crowd of acolytes, priests, and petitioners to the temple three dozen strong, all with glowing eyes and all paying the guardian not the slightest bit of attention. They stood in ranks like soldiers, their expressions vacant.
“Hop,” spoke Quennus, and in complete unison, the crowd hopped on the spot.
“Good Therans.”
Melind shook one of the people, trying to get a response out of them, to no effect.
“What have you done to them? They are bewitched!”
“You are familiar with the Sirens of your world; it is similar to their vaunted songs. These people’s will is mine to control for the moment. And this brings us to the question of choice. Hold him please.”
Suddenly, Melind was seized by a forest of arms, which held him tightly but gently.
“In a moment, I will instruct the crowd to retrieve the Orb of Mind Warding for me. They will hand it to me, and I will escape, the Orb my prize. You can of course stop them, so fascinated they are not capable of putting up much of a fight or moving with much speed. But they will not stop command unless killed or horribly injured. So hero, a choice: do you allow a thief to get away with stealing the Orb you have been sworn to protect, or do you stop me, at the cost of the health and lives of the very people who declare you a hero?”
Melind strained against the crowd holding him, spittle flying from his mouth.
“You bastard! You speak of choice, and yet this is what you do!”
Quennus raised a finger, shaking it once left right in a mechanical movement.
“A common misconception. You always have choices. That does not mean you always have good choices. Sometimes free will means choosing your damnation. That I leave in your hands. Now, Therans, retrieve the Blue Orb of Warding, and hand it to me. The rest, form a perimeter around me.”
As one, the crowd moved in perfect formation, circling Quennus, then locking arms in a ring of bodies. The few holding Melind released him, and moved without urgency to the altar of Ephara, where the Fabled Orbs of Warding lazily orbited. Each was about the size of a pair of clenched fists, and trailed thin white vapor as they moved. One was pale red of a blood-moon, the other a bleached orange, and the third a sky blue.
Quennus studied Melind intently as with slow inevitability, the entranced Therans walked over to the Orbs. The shortsword was in his hand, and he was watching the Therans with an intensely pained expression, a man torn between two ideals. Sweat had broken out on his head, and his body shook with nervous energy. His gaze was riveted on the Therans as they began to climb the dais to the altar.
Suddenly, like a bowstring breaking, Melind shot forward, sword raised and a cry partly borne of hysteria on his lips. He gave Quennus no mind, heading for the altar. Meanwhile, the entranced citizens silently formed a group allowing one of their number to be hoisted up. The young boy, no more than twelve, reached his arms out, waiting as first the orange, then the red orb wafted by.
“I have no need for further physical protection. And the soul, a debatable concept at best, the purvey of clergymen and poets, neither reliable sources. No, the mind is the one treasure worth guarding.”
The boy snatched the Blue orb in his hands, and with only small resistance pulled it out of its magical orbit. As he clutched the orb to his chest tightly and was lowered down, Melind was crossing the distance quickly. The two were on a collision course.
The child walked forward, flanked by the mesmerized adults. Their blue eyes were locked on their master, oblivious to the armed man charging at their ranks. With a cry Melind burst amongst their ranks, hurling the adults aside like a enraged rhinoceros. Shaking, sweating, a man possessed, Melind raised the short sword. He paused for a fraction of a second, his conviction wavering. As all moments of life-changing importance tend to do, time played out a little, making the moment seem like a lifetime. Out of the corner of his eye, Melind could see citizens start to rise. In a moment they would be on him, either attacking or in his way. He had to choose now.
The blade began to descend.
Internally, Quennus sighed. His left hand wiggled slightly where it was.
And the child turned to face Melind, looking directly up at him with those blue eyes. The Orb was held to its chest protectively, like a doll or stuffed sheep.
The blade, full of terrible, life-taking power, crashed into the floor, lodging in the stone. A second, Melind fell to his knees.
“I can’t….. no… I can’t….” he sobbed.
“Because you are a good man.” Spoke Quennus, not unkindly. “A flawed man, to be sure, but a good man in your heart.”
The child turned from Melind, placidly walking over to Quennus as if nothing had happened. Around it, the citizens stood, but stayed where they were. Melind was unmoving, whatever fight he had within him extinguished.
“You win. Just… take it and go. Be gone from here,” whispered Melind, not looking at Quennus.
The crowd parted, and the boy handed the Orb to Quennus, who took it with a metallic hand. Scrutinizing it for a moment, Quennus nodded in satisfaction, and the Orb took to the air to begin is orbit around the Bird-Mage. Quennus clapped once, and the bewitched people fell gently to the floor, in a deep sleep. Quennus shot an arm out, catching the child as he fell, gently lowering him to the ground. They would all awaken soon, no worse for the experience.
From within his cloak Quennus withdrew a small scroll, sealed with bronze and tied with gold thread. He tossed it, where it landed next to Melind.
“I am leaving Theros. Do not look for me, I won’t be found. When I return, if you are still alive, I shall find you, and give you the choice to try to and exact whatever revenge you think you deserve. Whether to take it or move on is up to you. You should know, I leave behind a number of trinkets and ingots of the last of my Stymphalian Bronze, as well as instructions on how to create more. The location is on that map.”
Quennus extracted a small, clicking cogwork device from within his cloak, and threw it to the ground. It burst in a shower of sparks, releasing the energy within, and with a whisper from Quennus to shape the unbound Aether, the energy formed into a swirling blue portal. Quennus mad to step through, but at the last moment stopped, and turned to regard Melind. The Meletian was watching him with a mix of amazement and fear. Perhaps he was considering his own failure or that perhaps the gods he had known all his life were not the only beings of power.
“The metal could be put to good use for the people of Theros, if you decide to share it with them. I now have confidence that you will make the right choice for them, and not for yourself. Farewell, guardian. Better luck with the other orbs.”
Then Quennus stepped through the portal and was gone.
Joshua Olsen
Email: jarraltandaris@hotmail.com
